I am having a severe problem with the above game. I am addicted - I have done over a thousand of these little puzzles and I have still have a couple of thick books to work on. The addiction is not so serious when compared to the relationship I have started to develop with the individual numbers. Because the numbers are constantly looking at you or you them. They are very much become part of your reality. Here's what has happened.

Number 1 - its a signature of perfection but generally plays very little role in actually solving the puzzle - therefore it is lazy or unnecessary. Take it out of the loop and you'd probably not miss it. In the long term though removing it would extract what ever purity is left in the game and also where would one start counting from ? - not from Number 2 - its part of the evil trio.

Number 2 - just look at it. Fat up top, one slender line to stand on which is just a pretense of elegance. Also it is looking to the left . It probably votes for Harper/Bush etc. This number must really think itself very special. It is constantly teaming up with Numbers 6 and 9 to make up a concoction of mind splitting tricks. They have that "bring it on" attitude. My only consolation is I usually win against the b'tards but not after having developed a brain tumour. They are the bad boys of the game and wish the would go back where they came from but that might open the gates of Hades.

Number 3 - its a wannabe - not exactly an 8, not graceful like 7, not pure like 1 and not evil like 2,6 and 9. Rumour has it that it hates Numbers 4 and 5. It is something that goes back several hundred years and has never been resolved. We will probably hold a commission on this - in Canada they hold commissions about anything - nose bleeds, grocery trolley wheels and I believe they are still investigating why French people speak French. This inquiry has been going on since 1493, with the same judge holding the chair; don't even think about the aroma of that committee room. But this is in a country where they hang someone and in 100 years time they are a national hero. Note to myself - get hung.

Number 4 - I really like it, something is so lovely about the Number in fact I am actually or maybe in love with a number! You can write and display it in so many ways. It can be stoic, fancy, graceful and even over the top. In the puzzle it usually reveals its location early giving a buzz to the solver. Particularly if the puzzle solver is using solvents.

Number 5 - now there's a number - bold and looking forward. He's a fair player in the puzzle. Never causing to much pain nor giving it out for free. Shame about the belly, never like that on a person. Actualy never did go there - haven't I been lucky?

Number 6 - he's nasty see Number 2. It's also the day of my birth so it really lucked out once - otherwise it needs to be put in the bin. Aren't I an egotist?

Number 7 - oh yes my girl freind. You can look to the left with grace. Someone should really tell Number 2 and of course to the those with a liking to the left should know that you can carry it off without the neccessity of appearing inhuman. Oh dear I think I am writing about numbers as humans and thereby losing the plot in due course.

Number 8 - its always Christmas Day with this one. She hides the gifts under the girth; she cooks like a mad woman and she's - well - she's fat! I have had a couple of run ins with her in the puzzle arena. But generally she makes little difference. I bet she's lonely and only hopes she'll not be forgotten.

Number 9 - see Number 2- but a couple of comments. He's not a 10 and knows it so we can play with his mind whenever we wish. Maybe this feeds the evil; but whatever is all I can say. Aren't I hip?

Happy Birthday Mark, Fiona, and Wayne.

As always and ever shall be
Pxx

It's far too bloody cold for a Brit & a Canadian Softie

I said "It was what?" the geeky weather man responded with "Due to a high pressure system hovering over the west coast it was -8C" I thought well that is just an excuse. The geek left with a bug in his ear and several chunks of ice where they won't melt quickly. What really irks me is they get paid to be nerds throughout their life time on earth.

Where does one go for compensation over even a nice old fashioned rate about these conditions? We need the UN to set up a commission.

As one can imagine there is only one conversation on the island and it is really becoming a bore. My solution is to start nasty rumours about the sexual escapades of the not very rich and famous - but at least throwing out names that are unexpected such as local clergy, carers at the local old folks home, and teachers that coach the local basketball team. Come to think of it they were all likely candidates. Well at least it breaks up the monotony.

I do think, though, that I am probably best with a a few drinks down the ole' gullet and as this is the month of abstention the stories, by previous standards, are not the same quality but the juices still flow within the story line. A few little tipples and the slander because more cruel and shocking... but that's pretty easy here, most have no idea what half of the words mean so they just have look of shock on their faces. You're guaranteed the facial responses one seeks unless they are Harley Davidson riders and you can't see thru the beard and whatever is in residence inside them.

Now about this not drinking lark. It's a kind of statement saying "I'm not dependent and I care about my well being". Yea right - I count the hours to the return of Lady Rumela Cocalo - she was edited out of a Oscar Wilde play. The character, an old auntie, visiting from her Lake Cuomo Villa, convinces you that you need her more than she needs you thus you partake in anything she says. Such a ancient predator and it can become messy around midnight. Lady Rumela of course has a very expensive digital camera/movie maker.

I was thinking the other day about the faeries at the bottom of the garden. During a severe cold snap do they have little fur jackets made from road kill? Do they set up little camp fires and dance to the wee hours to keep warm? Or do they pop over to the D.L. (dull lesbian) next door and move in using the folds of her form as snuggy respite from the deep freeze? (There's one about the a Witches' Tit, but I won't go there) I'm very sure that there is much activity but until now I have not shared these speculations with anyone.

Now you can understand what is happening when I stop partaking in the nectar of the gods. Hope Alan as forgotten to keep up with the blog as this posting could scare the B'Jesus out of him. Though he was never very religious so he'll just shake his head and mutter something in Sussex slang.

Can you imagine the dreams? Even Polanski wouldn't go there.

Sorry for delays in loading things; been fairly busy and my technical skills are very juvenile. Must get a cute 18 year IT student to pop over for biscuits and blogs.

Before I go:

Recipe for a Canadian Softie:

Start with aTim Horton's Frostie (looks like snow)

Maple sugar (its in the CDN Constitution that if don't use it you could time by courtesy of an Haitian woman if don't include the substance. We get our freinds to put it in curries, because they shouldn't be eating the crap)

Cheese curd (a nod to our French contingent - and we're just as scare as them as the Constitutional Courts)

Salmon from "up coast"(mind you not the stuff whereby they pre-chew if for you to make candy, exceptions made if you have young children)

Measurements and Quantities to taste - (like most things CDN it's questionable)
Serve fresh - preferably at a ice hockey game wearing one's homemade woolly hat(sorry toque, so stupd, whoa, puh) At least you know your mother love you once when you put these fashion statements. But I ask why do people want to look like they are lacking in the area of IQ or they trying to get across a sense of confidence and up yours boys kind of attitude?

Much love
Px

PS: Alt to making a CDN Softie - call Hundred Hills House there's a live one there.

02 January 2007 and they are trying to wash us away

Another 6 inches in 12 hours - dear me some would be pleased but when its just more rain it becomes rather hideous.

However, we would like to wish all a Happy New Year - you know the blah blah bit that follows

For those elsewhere in Canada enjoying far better weather may we also remind you that you pay for these pleasures. I have bottles of locusts specially poised for your summer. Must say that's rather vindictive of Mr Neale and I am sure Mr Alan would not approve. He would however invite you down to the marina for a ducking.

Best wishes all

P & A x